Don’t Do It For the Instagram

I don’t know who needs to hear this but, there’s more to traveling than getting that perfect shot to post on social media. Immersing yourself in a culture that’s different than your own reaps benefits far more important than the likes you’ll get on your Instagram. The lessons you’ll learn about yourself and the stories you’ll share with strangers will stay with you throughout your lifetime.

This is an excerpt from Anthony Bourdain’s Love Letter to Vietnam that I feature on another blog post (I’m so obsessed with it that I mention it twice on this site!). Shortly after returning from Vietnam, Bourdain sat with EF Outbound for an interview. His message resonates with me. His words pull at my heart strings. In case you don’t hear it (which you most definitely should) I’ve written it here —- “I felt both enriched and distanced from my former life. I had a very hard time relating to people, some people, that I had been very close to before. I had a hard time figuring out, not how I was going to tell these stories in a book or on TV, that’s relatively easy. But, how I would tell these stories to my friends and to my, then, wife was difficult. It still is. When you’ve been treated generously by strangers. When you’ve smelled things and tasted things and seen things that none of your friends have seen. That few from where you come from have seen. That are unlike anything you’ve seen before. Look, that changes you. Mostly, in really good ways. But I think you also have to be prepared for the possibility that it will alienate you, somewhat, from the life you once lived”.

And it’s true! I do what I do because I have a burning desire to see what else is out there - beyond my small hometown. Do I, in any way, think I am ‘better’ than my peers that have never left the United States? Am I a step above the general public because I have more stamps on my passport? Hell no! But, I will say, it is somewhat difficult for me to relate to someone that hasn’t experienced this unique feeling.

This is the usual small talk at the bar with a friend I haven’t seen in a while: “Hey! How’s it going?! How was your trip?”. I respond “Oh my God! Yeah, it was awesome! It’s so beautiful there” .. & that’s it. It’s so surface level that I feel like I’m doing the country a disservice by not going into more depth. But it seems I can’t expand upon it. Not because I don’t want to seem boastful about the fantasy life I live (I know when to draw the line) but because if you’ve only been to Disney World, you just won’t get it.

I’ve had a Vietnamese man invite me into his home to sit on his couch, drink beers and sing Elvis Presley songs. His wife didn’t speak a lick of English but she prepared a smorgasbord of snacks and joined us, smiling the entire time. I’ve seen sunsets (“yeah, we’ve all seen a beautiful sunset before Ky”) - no, I’ve seen the sun go down & turn the sky from orange to pink to purple to a darker blue while I stood above the clouds on a volcano in Indonesia! I’ve been a patient in hospitals in countries where I do not speak the same language as the doctor. Do you know what gypsy piss smells like? ‘Cause I do! This shit changes you. I mean, a fourteen hour flight - God damn, that alone changes someone!

Traveling alters the way you think about the world. How it’s so big yet so small.. Makes you look at the bigger picture. We might not speak the same language but we do share similarities: we are all humans who are deserving of love & happiness. It changes the way you think about other people that aren’t like you. That didn’t grow up with the same values as your family. Makes you a little less narrow-minded; a little more compassionate towards others that are less fortunate than you, yet very happy with what they do have. Lastly, it changes the way you see yourself.. Through these foreign affairs I know I’ve grown mentally. I am not the same person I was prior to exploring 28 countries. Naturally, I’ve matured with age but I’m more brave & more independent than ever before.

And these are things that I can’t share with friends, colleagues, or whoever asks about my trips. It’s a whole experience I can’t put into words and they can’t relate unless they’ve walked a mile in my shoes. Like Bourdain implied, you have to know it understand it. And, it’s not about Instagram likes.. You’ll come back from these places with more than just that!